Difficult for my wife, but changed me for the better!
Nigel Biggs, Innovation Consultant
 
What was the context/situation/challenge?
At age 30 I took a permanent job in Germany with a German company which meant moving there on my own first and finding a flat to move my family there with our first child at 3 months old.
 
What were the particular characteristics of the situation that engaged you in an immersive way?
I did not speak German so every day was a challenge. From the first day when I finally had to say something to buy some food up to the time (a year or so later) when I realized I had just had a full conversation totally in German. This was not helped initially by working for a German boss who spoke perfect English all day.  
 
What forms of learning / personal development / change emerged from the situation?
The main change was the eventual growth in confidence to stick with speaking German especially at work. An early occurrence would be that I would say (try to say) something in German, my work colleague would answer in English and I would (with relief) continue in English. The next steps would be to continue in German instead and just persevere. This transition took place over many months and was greatly helped when I eventually worked just for German-speaking colleagues.  In public (shopping, meeting friends etc.) there was more need to speak everyday German but of course we spoke English at home -  and with English friends. Overall I think that this whole experience made me much more confident and able to tackle new situations. Indeed after four years I even took Italian evening classes in Germany as well.
 
What words/concepts/feelings would you use to describe the immersive experience?
After the first four days in the country I had learned about ten ways a person can say “No, the flat has gone”. Goodness knows how I even asked as it was always over the phone. I remember sitting in the park on the first (and very quiet) Sunday (no shops open, no friends) asking myself just what was I doing bringing my family out to a strange place. It was not depression exactly but was more like doubt, uncertainty, loneliness. This turned out to be a common early feeling with all the later new employees from England but it only lasted a short time. (In fact I found a flat the next day!). Overall I would describe my five year experience as broadening my life, extending my view of other people and cultures, being difficult for my wife, but changing me for the better!
 
What principles or lessons can be drawn from this story?  
Moving outside one’s comfort zone and “risking” new experiences just has to be good, even if (as I have subsequently learned) it does not always work out as you might have expected. Understanding the mix of one’s motives and fears (and those of others) is a valuable lesson for later life.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 


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